The Malfoys
by Linxcat
Summary: A curious noise awakes Mr Malfoy in the night....which leads on to many other discoveries! DracoPansy


Draco Malfoy was woken to the sound of puking.

Now, in his household, puking was not a sound that was heard often. He was rather unaccustomed to it. So he sat in his bed for a few moments, wondering what on earth that sound could be, and really, was it necessary, he was trying to sleep.

He was about to wake Pansy up and ask her, with her knowledge of all things girly, what the hell was this thing that had woken him, when he noticed that she was not by his side.

_Huh?_

At four o-clock in the morning, Draco was not at his smartest. He paused for several seconds wondering where she could be.

It was only then that he realised where the sound was coming from.

And also, at that split second, he realised what the sound was.

So, his early-woken brain chugging back into life, he came to the conclusion as to where Pansy was.

It was Pansy, puking, in the bathroom!

_Strange. Did she eat something bad?_

"Pansy?" he called.

His only reply was a low groan from the direction of the en-suite, but the groan sounded very much like Pansy. So he tried again.

"Pansy?"

"Yes, Draco?" came the answer. Her voice sounded weak and choked. Oh dear.

_Pansy's ill. Sympathy. Try for a little sympathy. _

"Are you alright?"

_Ok, not the smartest question there. She's puking!_

"No."

"Oh. Ok."

Draco sat back on the bed, at a complete loss as to what to do. What did one do when one's wife was puking in the en-suite? Someone should write a book. He should write a book. If only he wasn't so dammed busy - looking after his father's money (well, spending it) was a full-time job.

_I'm not using THAT loo later. Ugh. _

Too right. If this puking business was going to become regular they were going to have to do something about it. Perhaps they could get another loo to use normally. Yes, that would be good. They could install a second toilet next to the first one. Pansy could use the first one for puking, and the second one would be used for - well, normal stuff.

What if Pansy accidentally slipped up and used the wrong loo to puke in? Then we'd have to buy another one.

Hmm. Draco rubbed his chin. If the worst came to the worst, they could always put a sign up. PUKING TOILET, PEEING TOILET. That would work. Hey, why not make it look stylish - they could get gold-plated signs! It was pure genius! He would call the bathroom showroom right away.

Wait a second; it's four in the morning.

So?

_So the bathroom showroom people aren't going to be happy at being woken up, are they?_

Hmm, good point. They might charge more. Ok, he'd call them first thing in the morning. Ah, yes, that way he could bring Pansy too. He didn't want her moaning on about how for heaven's sake the loo didn't even match the wallpaper, let alone the _tiles_. Pansy liked everything just so.

Draco allowed himself a small triumphant smile. Genius. Pure genius.

"Draco?" Pansy's voice floated out from the bathroom.

"Yes?"

"Do you think you possibly get off your wonderful arse for a few seconds and get me a glass of water?"

Draco grinned. _Pansy and her sense of humour._

"I'll call the house-elf."

"Thank you." Pansy's voice sounded worse than ever. No dinner party tonight, then.

At the word house-elf, the house-elf apparated in the middle of the master bedroom.

"You called, master?"

"Yes, yes. Get Pansy a glass of water and…a pot of tea for me. Earl Grey, you know how much I hate Lapsang. Oh, and the number for the bathroom showroom. Thanks."

"Yes master, of course master." The house-elf disappeared. A few moments later, he reappeared with a tray laden with breakfast and a piece of paper fluttering in one hand.

"Tordy took the privilege of preparing food too, master. The telephone number is here."

Tordy laid the tray gently down on the bed and handed his master the slip of paper. Draco's mouth twitched a little towards the elf in what could have been a surprised smile, but didn't quite make it. Instead he nodded curtly and Tordy disapparated.

When the house-elf had gone, Draco grinned and sniffed the breakfast hungrily. Bacon and egg toasty. A muggle favourite, but very delicious.

Carefully, he lifted up the tray and climbed out of bed, not forgetting to deposit the paper on his desk on the way to the en-suite. He nudged the door open with his foot.

Pansy was sitting on the floor, slumped against the shower door. Her dark hair was ruffled and face even paler than normal. She looked thoroughly ill. Her eyes flickered open as she heard him enter.

"Hello." She mumbled. "Bathroom showroom?"

"New toilet. If this puking thing happens often, we're not going to use that toilet normally, are we? That's disgusting. So we get a new toilet. Fluffy lids and gold plated signs. Brilliant." Draco used his fingers to target the area for the new toilet. Pansy raised her eyebrows and snorted.

"'If this puking thing happens often'? Draco, the only reason I would continue to throw up is-"

Pansy stopped. Her eyes widened a little. Draco froze.

"Pansy, if you're going to puke again, get your head over that toilet NOW…"

"No, no," Pansy gave what seemed like a nervous little laugh. "The only reason I would continue to throw up is…well," she rubbed her nose, "impossible."

"Right," Draco gave her a strange look.

"Did you…?"

"Oh, yeah," he handed her the glass of water and she downed it in one.

"What's that smell? Oh, muggle food - brilliant. I won't tell if you don't." she reached out hungrily for the sandwich. Draco frowned.

"Pansy, you've just puked out half your insides. Don't tell me you're _hungry_?"

"I thought you were a genius? Duh, I've got nothing inside me. Hungry!" she made to eat the sandwich, but Draco snatched it from her.

"One, that's _my_ breakfast, and two, did you ever consider that because you're ill the sandwich might make you puke _more_?" he huffed, placing the sandwich down again.

"But I'm hungry!" she protested.

"Get back into bed and I'll get Tordy to make some toast." He said firmly, trying to remember what his mother had done when he'd been ill. He had eaten hardly anything.

"You're right," Pansy sighed, the colour the hunger had brought draining from her cheeks, eyes drooping, "I am feeling a little…weak…"

Draco only just caught her in time. He slipped one hand underneath her knees and carried her bridal-style to the bed. Then he disapparated to go and get the toast.

By the time he got back, Pansy was fast asleep again, hair fanned out across the pillow.

She looks quite pretty.

It was true. Her pale skin tone contrasted drastically with her chocolate-dark hair, her lips were a vibrant red (perhaps leftover lipstick from last night?) and her lashes were thick and fluttered slightly as she shifted in her sleep. He placed the toast on the side-table and sat beside her on the bed.

"Why did you get up?"

Pansy's emerald eyes snapped open. She scowled.

"How did you know I was awake?" she grumbled. He smirked.

"I closed the bathroom door behind me. And now its open. You've been up, and tried to hide it. Why?"

Pansy rolled her eyes; "Perhaps you can work it out yourself, Mr Ministry detective."

"Hmmm," Draco walked over to the bathroom door and looked inside. "Cabinet's ajar," he opened that and scanned the titles of books. He smiled as he saw one of the books sticking out, "Here we are. Pansy, you really are hopeless at covering your tracks." He pulled the tome from the shelf, noted the lack of dust, and read out the words on the cover, "'General Symptoms, Tests and Diagnoses for the home'. What did you want _this_ old thing for?"

The colour that had left Pansy's face returned instantly. Her features softened, eyes avoiding his awkwardly.

"I…I was going to tell you, I promise. I just needed…time to work out what to say…" she mumbled feebly. He folded his arms.

"Pansy, really, what on _earth_ are you going on about?" Draco snapped. But it was a front, as concern was building up inside him. Pansy was awkward, flustered even. What could she possibly have found out that agitated her so much?

"I…I…Draco…" her gaze met his slate-grey eyes. "I'm pregnant."

Draco was so surprised that he didn't even register pain as the book landed on his foot.

He was expecting Pansy to say the _flu_ or measles, not…not…

_Holy shit! I'm a dad! _

"I…that is…I…" he opened and closed his mouth, before dropping heavily on the bed beside her. "Girl or boy?"

"Boy," she replied, then, "Your dad's gonna be happy. An heir."

Draco shook his head, "Pansy, _I'm_ happy! Hysterically, insanely…" he laughed and grinned, "Its crazy! Totally bizarre…" he rubbed his forehead, "I'm a Malfoy, I shouldn't be…I've never…"

"I know!" Pansy laughed with him, shoulders shaking in relief and hysteria, "It must be the shock! I can't stop laughing!"

Without realising what he was doing, Draco pulled Pansy into his arms and hugged her tightly. He could feel her stomach pressing against his, and tried to imagine the tiny being inside. The tiny being that, in a few short months, would be a baby. His _son_!

It was crazy - he felt like some kind of madman, but he couldn't stop the corners of his mouth twitching into a smile. It must have been instinctive, because he couldn't remember ever feeling like this. When he had been presented with new toys and brooms, it was smugness he felt - they were better than anyone else's and he was gonna beat anyone that came near. With birthday surprises, he felt satisfaction. A hug from his mother made him feel safe. The only recollection of this feeling was perhaps after the Battle of Hogwarts, when Pansy had thrown her arms around him, sobbing, and he had realised just how worried she had been about him. That was a warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest. This was like a warm, fuzzy _explosion_. Was this how everyone felt? He would have to ask father.

That train of thought made something click in his mind.

"Oh Merlin, Pansy, you know what this means,"

Pansy looked up at him questioningly,

"We'll have to find a Malfoy name."


End file.
